Fandom High Security Office, Tuesday, Jan 24th

[nookiepowered]

It was one of those days.

Not one of Those Days, thank God; Bo had two of everything she was supposed to have two of and none of everything she was supposed to have none of and she wasn't singing or standing on a crate to make milkshakes.

It was just one of those days when, three days after finding out the hard way that using Tiny as a barometer of drink-strength was only slightly smarter than kissing a fish, she was sitting in her office, going through her e-mail, and finding out the harder way that no one should let her near a computer on Saturday nights.

"I signed up for what?"

Hi, theboobsthingwasatypo! Welcome to the best dating site in the multiverse! We know you're anxious to start using the site and checking out our kabillions of active users. Our matching system is the best in the business...

Facedesk.

[C'est open!]

Comments

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

After Anarchy Club, Kenzi went in search of Bo. Well, she went to her office and half-hoped she wouldn't be there so she could play with her Special Chair. But finding her there wasn't so bad.

"Hey, you... what's with the existential despair look?"

[nookiepowered]

"NOTHING!" As evidenced by Bo flinging herself bodily in front of the monitor screen, right? Because Alt+Tab was for people who remembered you could do that. "There is no despair. My existence is peachy."

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"Oooo." Kenzi put down the big box (http://www.clouboutinoutletsale.com/images/Christian_Louboutin_Boots_02.JPG) with the red twirly bow on it, and tried to pry Bo's fingers off the screen. "Waitaminute, that looks like--"

[nookiepowered]

"Spam! It looks like Spam, is what it looks like. Evil, unsolicited internet mystery meat."

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"OKStupid thinks you want their hot dogs?" Kenzi said brightly, finally having gotten a look at the logo. "How very concerned of them. Although I don't think you should live on that kind of diet, Bo. It can't be good for you."

[nookiepowered]

"I don't want anybody's hot dogs!" Bo protested. Which, ok, not entirely accurate. "Well, not hot dogs off the internet. Who knows where they've been?"

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"Or what they're made of?" Kenzi said sagely. "Mr. Rogers kinda made that point in Sex Ed today. A handshake's as good as a kiss is as good as sex and then where are you? Without bacon cookies, randomly getting the clap from Matt Murdock."

[nookiepowered]

Bo gave up on covering the screen and sank back in her chair, raising her eyebrows at Kenzi. "Please tell me you know you can't get the clap from a handshake."

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi snickered madly, and perched on the desk. "Please. Mostly I'm in that class for the fun of watching other people flail. And teasing Topher."

[nookiepowered]

"Has he managed to avoid getting punched in the face so f--PRESENT?"

Delayed reaction, okay? Okay?

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi cackled and poked the box closer to Bo. "Present! And so far, yeah. Even if Mr. Rogers looked like he wanted to shake him when he refused to touch a banana that touched a condom... open the present!"

[nookiepowered]

"This is the same Mr. Rogers who teaches art?" Bo gleefully -- but sedately like a grownup really -- attacked the ribbon before glancing up again. "The Boy Scouts of America Rogers?"

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi snickered, her feet swinging. "Yup! The one who looks like a recruiting poster for healthy life. If I were ten years older... well, I wouldn't be in that class."

[nookiepowered]

"If he were any less human, he wouldn't be in that class because I'd never let him leave my--BOOTS!"

Possibly not the noun she was planning to end on. Then again, probably a more appropriate appropriate ending for a conversation in the security office with a student.

Because Bo was good at appropriate.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi cackled at both the information that was cut off, and the reaction to the shiny shiny boots. "You're sure he's human? He's way too cute. And you like? Aren't they cool? I almost kept them for myself."

[nookiepowered]

"Why do I get boots?" Please forgive her for this next question, Kenzi. "...Do I need to go give these boots back to somebody and explain that you have a mental condition and can't help yourself? I need to know this before I let myself fall in love with them."

Too late. Mmmm, leather.

She should... probably stop touching them that way.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

Kenzi snickered, hugging her legs to her chest. "Just this once, there's no take-backs. They're your cut of my money, since otherwise it'd be in Maryland and I couldn't spend it for the next however-too-long. So thank you." And Kenzi would keep all the money to her own-self most of the time too, but this was Bo, and it was fun to buy *her* something cool.

"Although, I like that you have that explanation all ready to go."

[nookiepowered]

"I've been perfecting it for a while. Next step is getting somebody to forge the commitment papers." Bo, stop caressing the footwear. "You don't owe me a cut, though; that's your cash, fair and square."

Probably. Besides whatever illegal things she and Toby had done in the process of earning that reward, because Bo was born in the dark, but it wasn't last night.

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

"Yeah, I know." It was even legal! "But hey, if I'm not spending it on hookers and blow, I have to go with my other vice." She grinned and held out her own foot, covered in new Doc Martens (http://www.dmusastore.com/p-3849-1460.aspx). "I figured, a couple splurges, save the rest for an emergency... like diamond shoes!" Watching Bo, she grinned. "Should I leave you guys alone?"

[nookiepowered]

Bo shook her head and patted the toe of one of her boots. "Please. What kind of girl do you think I am?" Don't answer that, Kenzi. "We have to get to know each other first."

[regretiz4suckas.livejournal.com]

More giggling. "Boots, this is Bo. She likes men, women, ice cream, and being able to protect people. Bo, these are the Boots. They like long walks, slow dancing, and the occasional polishing. I hope you three are going to be really happy together."

[nookiepowered]

"Nice work. You could get a job writing OkStupid profiles for people. If you actually needed yet another job."

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

Hercules, package tucked under his arm, knocked on the door to Bo's office and leaned in.

"Hellooooo?" he said.

[nookiepowered]

This time, Bo was prepared.¹ Ha! Alt+Tab it was.

"Hey look, it's my favorite ex-god." Also the only ex-god she knew, or at least the only ex-god she knew she knew. But shh, technicalities. "What's up? Come on in."
__
¹ Knowing Kenzi prepared you for a lot of things. Only some of them requiring a bail-money-fund. ...Okay, most of them.

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"I have a package for you," Hercules said, walking in with a smile on his face. "And I'm also happy to see you!"

That was funnier in his head.

[nookiepowered]

Bo covered her snicker...vaguely. Then ruined that with, "Nice...delivery."

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"Well I always deliver on a promise," Hercules said, placing the still sealed Amazon box on Bo's desk. "All twelve episodes of the New Labors of Hercules. Including my commentary tracks!"

He'd had fun doing those.

[nookiepowered]

"Thank you. I think." Bo grinned, flipping the box over to look at the back. "You did commentary tracks for a reality show?"

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"It was the only way I let them sell the DVD," Hercules said, as if it was something to be proud of. "Plus they offered me free wings. It was a good trade."

[nookiepowered]

Bo would blame Warren Worthington for her frown and squinty-eyed glance at Herc's wingless shoulders, if she knew That Kid With The Wings was Warren Worthington.

"Uh...wings?"

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"At a Hooters, if you want that much detail," Hercules said. "My server was named Candi, if I remember correctly. Spelled with an i, not a y."

He pondered that memory. "It was a fair trade for a few hours of my time."

[nookiepowered]

Aaaand she'd reached the point where Fandom had ruined her for the easy, normal answer to anything. Great.

"So free wings and breasts, then. Good deal."

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"And short-shorts," Hercules said. "Though usually the women in such places are a little... plastic for my tastes. I still tip them as one should, as they all have their own lives to fund."

He nodded sagely. "Ever find anyone to participate in the pillow fight?"

[nookiepowered]

"I dunno - what're your feelings about Steve Rogers?"

If she knew more about either of them, she'd know she was going to hell for that suggestion, instead of just being 87% certain.

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

Hercules just laughed. "I have fought him before. But never with him disrobed or with pillows!"

He chuckled some more. "I think there is fanfiction like that in my world."

[nookiepowered]

"I think Frank Miller made a movie of it." Wrong Greek homoerotic fanfic there, but in Bo's defense, she knew that.

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"Of Avengers having a pillow fight?" Hercules said. "I would have thought I heard of that..."

Yes, he was taking Bo's words as serious.

[nookiepowered]

"Well, they might've taken a few liberties and made it swords and Spartans, but they retained the hot shirtless Greek guys theme..."

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"Well, the Spartans didn't really believe in shirts. Which is somewhat of a problem when it comes to armor, but it suited them just fine. It suits me just fine most of the time," Hercules mused.

"I think I've seen that movie. It was funny."

[nookiepowered]

"Funny?" Bo repeated, thinking of slo-mo swirling sashes and flying blood and coming up with overdramatic, but not humorous.

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"Well, in parts," Hercules said, chuckling at the memory. "It is amazing how much blood was in their enemy!"

[nookiepowered]

Bo wrinkled her nose. "Remind me not to let you pick the comedies on movie nights."

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"Amadeus kept saying the same thing," Hercules said, a little baffled. "But I guess I will do my best to remind you."

"...does this mean I'm invited to movie night?"

[nookiepowered]

"Sure! Not that I've had a movie night since I was young enough for unironic pillow fights and parents who made sure we didn't rent anything worse than PG-13, but it doesn't sound like a bad idea." Though possibly it meant she needed to buy a tv bigger than her laptop screen.

"...Amadeus as in rock me, comma?"

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"As in Cho, seventh smartest person in my universe," Hercules said. "We traveled together for a long time, recently. He's a good young man."

He smiled a proud smile. "He's off doing his own thing, now."

[nookiepowered]

"Ahhh. That makes so much more sense than Mozart not liking your taste in comedy."

[olympian-herc.livejournal.com]

"I'm sure he'd probably disagree too," Hercules said. "He always struck me as a stuffy little jerk."

He nodded sagely.

Smirking the whole time.